Banjo Man has never suffered from a lack of opinions. He has always had a lot of them. Millions, even.

Sometimes they are welcomed, others greeted with groans, eye rolls and actual hostility. I admit that in our fifty-five years together I have often been in the “hostile” category. One time his very unwelcome opinion resulted in a slammed door and a broken door frame.

He remained undeterred.

So here we are now, battling cancer. I say “we” because dealing with cancer takes both of us. It’s a joint war, whether it’s breast or prostate cancer. Someone drives the other to the scans, tests, procedures, radiation and doctor appointments. It’s how it works. And thank God we have each other.

Banjo Man’s latest opinion was that I should get a second opinion about my latest cancer treatment. I admit, I was having a very, very difficult time with the side effects of the treatment of shots and pills. I could barely walk, couldn’t eat (lost five pounds in a month), couldn’t think, could barely stand. Was this misery going to last for the rest of my life? Angela, our sweet oncologist friend who has taken such good care of us, is taking a break from practicing, but she kept checking on me, was appalled by my condition and urged me to stop. My doctor finally comprehended the severity of my side effects and ordered a 3-week break from treatment before we started up again.

I dreaded it. And Banjo Man kept insisting we needed a second opinion.

Yes, Banjo Man had an opinion about opinions.

So I (I admit, reluctantly, because I was exhausted) made the call to Dana Farber, a famous cancer center in New England. There was a location about an hour and fifteen minutes from home in Massachusetts. They offered second opinion consultations as one of their services, so Monday we were on the road at 6:45 AM to brave rush hour traffic and the interstate to talk to an oncologist.

And because I’d had a break from shots and pills, I was able to walk across the parking lot.

To say it was a good consultation would be a grand understatement. She suggested a different treatment plan (because my cancer had been caught early and hadn’t spread yet). When the time came to start shots and pills again, it would be done very gradually and with great supervision.

Did we love this new oncologist’s opinions? We sure did. Did we switch my care to Dana Farber? We sure did. Have I thanked Banjo Man a hundred times for his insistence on getting another opinion? I sure have.

I am tolerating the new medication well and will be tracked with blood tests and PET scans every 6-8 weeks.

So…keep your fingers crossed for me.

And if you are questioning your health care and losing faith in your treatments, get a second opinion. Even if Banjo Man doesn’t tell you to.