Oh, how true…

Last week I had my annual physical. Before the doctor trotted in, his very young nurse took my blood pressure and went over the list of medications and asked familiar questions. You all know the drill: Do you feel safe at home? Have you fallen in the last six months? Any trips to the ER?

But then she mumbled something about Medicare and said she had to go over a few more things. I was still silently congratulating myself for decent blood pressure numbers. And then it began…

Do you know what month it is? The year?

Huh?

I wasn’t prepared. But I sputtered, “April, 2026.”

It continued.

What time do you think it is?

Remember these three things and I will ask you to repeat them later.

Count backwards from 20 to 1.

Recite the months of the year backwards.

Tell me the three things I asked you to remember.

I passed the test just fine, despite being nervous and worrying that I was in some kind of mental decline and didn’t know it.

Thank goodness she didn’t ask:

Do you remember what aisle the baked beans are in at Stop & Shop? (Answer: Never. It’s a mystery.)

Have you left wet clothes in the washing machine in the past month? (Yes. Drives Banjo Man crazy.)

Have you measured quilting fabric more than three times before cutting it? (Always have.)

Do you know what you’re having for dinner tonight? (Dinner? What’s that?)

Have you lost your phone in the house this week? (Uh…)

And my favorite:

Do you know what day it is immediately upon waking? (No. I’m retired and don’t need to.)