a monster in the living room



It looked small on the Walmart shelf.


Last spring Banjo Man decided we needed a bigger television, so I made cardboard templates of both 50″ and 55″ screens and placed them over the 42″ tv that fit so nicely in our living room.

We agreed that 50″ was plenty big enough.  Anything else would be ridiculous.

So last Wednesday, after returning the rental car (which was another stress-filled experience I won’t blog about) and delivering a Fed Ex package to a credit union near the airport (a package stuffed with the important financial documents of five people and dropped at our rural, wooded front door by mistake) and getting lost three times, we stopped at Wal Mart to look at TV’s.

Banjo Man was pushing the limit to a 55″.  I had agreed, but I was in a post-trip coma and only interested in buying Triscuits, milk, bacon and eggs for Son #2 aka Story Man’s Friday arrival (he would be here for the weekend attending a friend’s wedding).

Banjo Man pointed out that there was little difference in size between a 55″ screen and a 60″ screen.  I pointed out that this WalMart had a Subway sandwich shop.

I showed him the measurements of the Samsungs and the LG’s.  He measured them himself with a dollar bill (6″ long, should you ever need to measure something).

We decided we were too tired to make a decision and would get a sandwich instead.

At home again, we measured our living room space again, and Banjo Man assured me that he would shorten the legs on our tv stand (a vintage table) and, once lowered, a 60″ tv would hardly be noticed.  The next afternoon we went south, to our local Walmart, and bought the thing.

We had plenty of time to change our minds, because the only employee with the license to get on a high ladder and retrieve the tv from the storage room mysteriously disappeared for 45 minutes.  But Banjo Man didn’t mind.  That 60-incher was almost–ALMOST–in his possession.  He could wait.  And wait he did.

Once we got it home and set it up–I almost fainted at the size of the box–it is indeed very, very big.  I told Banjo Man he would have to leave the room while I programmed everything and did the technical stuff.

So those of you who come over for dinner here in the woods, just be prepared to see the GIANT TELEVISION looming over the living room.  I’ve thought about making  a curtain for hit, but I probably won’t get around to it.  Meanwhile, Banjo Man is ecstatic.

It’s our Christmas present to each other for the next three years.  But on Saturday, when we get to watch Nebraska play football, it will be worth it…and no screen can be too big when it comes to watching the Cornhuskers.

At least, that’s what I heard at Walmart.






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